life updates

 i'm happy to say things have been nice and calm. recently a new coworker has become a friend of me and elize. her name is kamila. she is also a fan of our band, usually the only one to be there every show....i think this is my first friendship in a long time. you see, besides elize, i don't really have bonds with anyone else.. when we were kids, i was a loner at school.....it's probably easy to guess just by looking at me, but i was bullied..... elize has always been social but she didn't like her friends, they didn't match her interests....so she ditched them for me and the rest was history..
we grew up and things stayed mostly the same....she made new friends, and i tagged along not making any of my own. ...i always feel inadequate if i'm not by her side. i stutter horribly....my hands shake....like a recluse creature......but meeting kamila was a first step in a nice direction. i think introverts do good together, and she is also one of those, like me.....

adapting to the city was hard, it doesn't care about you.....getting with the crowd, making ends meet......the subway, the cars, the bus.......people making fun of my accent, my food....you know. maybe that's part of where all this social anxiety comes from.....it's hard to fit in..but after so many years, i'm on my way....i have a girlfriend who loves me, and i love her....and now a friend, and a job. i feel like an adult, even if from time to time i still feel small like a little boy....i live...